yo I wanna see you, bring that beard of yours
Trying not to fart in the comp lab is going to take everything i've got.
At what point did I eat out of your mouth?
I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
Just because he saw my boobs doesn't mean he knows me all of a sudden
some drunk guy just paid $3 for each cig that i picked up off the ground. the cigs that he threw on the ground. I might just follow him the rest of the night
I held a cracker & gaterade down for an hour. I feel like this will be my greatest accomplishment of the day.
THERE ARE ENTIRELY TOO MANY HOT UNDERAGE GIRLS HERE FOR THIS TO REMAIN LEGAL.
its 4am. im standing over him in my bed eating chinese food, on the phone with dan trying to convince him to break up with his gf. whoredom.
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
I don't know. Something about answering "what did you do on Sunday?" Seems odd when the reply is, painted, went to the grocery store, put a restraint device on my bed.
I've been asked to reupholster their slam-couch so I found some off-cuts of medical-grade, hermetically sealed fabric. She'll be slammed upon for generations to come.
Herpes is not a lady problem you can solve with shower beers and kissing boys
LACE UP YOUR GODDAMN SHOES
N O
You think my vibrator will be okay in the dishwasher?
Randomize
