let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
Sorry I couldn't answer your call, I'm expecting a call from Chris Hansen.
I'm guessing you didn't end up going to the bar last night.
Nope. Ended up at what I believe was a slumber party down the street.
Best moment of my life. I just got a text from some random number that said i can't wait to touch you. Her name is kiara and she had the wrong number.
How come ATM is perfectly acceptable, yet not washing your hands after you poo is socially reprehensible?
i feel as if last night was a right of passage. to officially be an adult you must have a drunken one night stand with a co-worker and go to work the next day still drunk wearing yesterday's clothes...
I just found out my first birthday was a keg party. Suddenly everything makes sense
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
You threw a hot dog at his face...I wouldn't call you either.
YOU NEED TO STOP BLOWING DUDES ON MY COUCH AT MY PARTIES
YOU NEED TO STOP PROVIDING TEQUILA AT YOUR PARTIES
Our friendship would be less complicated if your dad didn't think I was forcing you into having gay sex with me
you were yelling that somebody needed to take your bra off with such enthusiasm my first thought was that you were on fire.
the evidence suggests last night I either took a bath in beer or drank 18 beers while in the bath. either one sounds good to me. sad i don't remember it
WHAT IS HAPPENING
A FLOCK OF DICKS IS MIGRATING TOWARDS US.
there's still a lot i don't remember, like why my iphone's nailed to your wall
Saw a sign that said the chorus of never gonna give you up was enough time to wash your hands. Coronavirus has Rick rolled me.
Randomize
