I want my own midget army. I think I would be a good midget army leader.
turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
I'm too high to be shopping. I just contemplated deoderant for fifteen minutes. Now testing pillows
Dude you ate toast sprawled out on my kitchen floor and said "this is comfy". No more day drinking.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Does he cat effect his dick pics to you? Because THAT is true love
I just can't promise there won't be a reason to hit you in the face with a dildo again in the future.
Thank god I didn't get free from the hospital restraints. I wouldent have lasted long drunk, startled and in an ass-less gown In D.C.
my window is missing, there is half a pizza jammed into the disk slot of my PS3, and the entire kitchen floor is covered in cerial i cant see any wood floor. did we have fun?
The night before doing drugs with your bro is like Christmas Eve that made love to thanksgiving that made love a virgin.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Up until today, I never would have thought I'd have to tell someone not to color on the cat
I HAVE PIZZA MONEY AT ALL TIMES IT'S CALL EMERGENCY PLANNING
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
He screamed, "Let there be light!" when he came
It was bad. U were calling my cat "kittiano" and playing her like a piano. Way too drunk my friend.
What is ur current declared sexuality for my bingo board
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