I tried to give up sex for lent. It feels weird that on easter I'm this excited to be a whore again
I feel dirty and I went home alone. Bars should be like airlines and make fat girls pay double for everything.
We had sex in his tahoe, talked about how we don't love each other and then high fived twice. Best Day Ever
Note: footlong is not the password to the subway wi fi network.. p.s- im super high
She celebrated a negative pregnancy test by going out to Quizno's. I really don't understand her at all.
im using the astroglide sample u sent me as a bookmark for the book im using to write my midterm paper. i need to get laid. bad.
My uncrustable is thawing in my straightener
Walking through campus with a grocery bag full of pot brownies. I'm like the santa claus of 4/20
I yelled out look at all those hickeys. And then gave her boyfriend a high five
So, were they human bite marks at least?
Your guess is as good as mine.
Gotta admit I did think about bartering you out to the gay guys for $20 and the dudes flashy neck scarf
The struggle bus crashed, rolled down a mountain, and went on fire, and I was on it ugh.
I'm pants less watching buffy the vampire slayer drinking rum. I'm not that hard to impress
I've officially slept with/dated two guys that have gotten tased. What the fuck is wrong with me
For someone who claims to be straight, she knows a hell of a lot about bi erasure, and one Hayley Kiyoko song too many
Randomize
