wow wtf my bar tab was 80 dollars
IT WAS DOLLAR BEER NIGHT
Either she got face surgery at midnight, or i need to stop drinking...
I didn't think I could chip a tooth while giving a blowjob until I met him.
So I'm pretty sure I fucked the dept of homeland security guy on my kitchen table. No recollection of it, but there are signs.
Just heard a guy on the phone saying " ya ill buy the eight ball " then came to my register to ask what asile the sugar substitute is on.
Nothing on google about my condom issue. However, if you get a chance google: condom with teeth.
well he has a gf so if he picks me up tonight i'll only him finger me
walmarts paint section shouldnt be open at 3am
My mom made me write an apology letter to all my family for hijacking the eggnog.
Just climbed to the top of a frozen waterfall! Do you want to do drugs tm night? The two are unrelated.
You actually went to class. Im eating dry cereal naked and watching bring it on.
I had sex with him for the first time drunk, dressed in a toddler overall tutu costume, at 2pm. Horrible start.
Everyone should just give me a copy of their keys. I take your dog out and I bring beer.
I had sex with a boy who lives in a closet, that's like having sex with Harry Potter, right?
It was rocky mountain showdown of course we got shitfaced and talked about eating buffaloes
Randomize
