I wanna wear you like a flannel shirt
And by the way, how is me getting head even remotely comparable to you fucking 3 guys?
I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up
I wrote my name on his balls in sharpie. In the homosexual world that's like a diamond ring. Shits permanent.
Stop banging my friends. This is getting weird.
Stop being friends with hot 18 year old girls.
Your subconscious sucks. Mine is awesome. I have a recurring dream where I manage a chocolate factory run by big titted hookers.
A) you're a liar. B) that would be awesome.
They switched jackets and you didn't notice. You made out with both of them and had no idea
OMG. Hung over at my grandparents house. Threw up on 3 T-stops, countless snowbanks, and the grandparents driveway. Was proposed to last night. Bruised from head to toe from falling down 3 flights of stairs. Debating my intelligence because it seems that "happy new years" is too hard for me to spell. How were your new years festivities?
No, it wasn't really a sexy 'I'm going to go masturbate.' It was an 'I'm going to go masturbate' that implied I was going to drink a tall boy of Mikes and cry while I looked at lesbian porn.
Thank god he came over. I had to have some good sex to makeup for all the bad sex I've been having.
He literally had a Trump sign in his front yard. I just can't now.
Wasted. And I have 5 pounds of potatoes that I'm responsible for.
will a lunchtime blow job make it better?
I have had flashes of 69ing, a strawberry flavored condom and begging him to sleep naked.
Will exercising make me less horny?
Randomize
