I believe that I finger-banged my way to the top of the corporate ladder.
she asked if she could keep her bee antennas on during her mugshot. i love halloween.
the bouncer kept askin you for id just to see how long it would take you to find your pants
You kept yelling that her vagina looked like a hatchet wound.
Ok cool. Ill pick up liquor because, well let's be honest, we don't need an excuse anymore.
I knew shit got real when the pinapple was gone and people were just passing around the core and gnawing on it.
dude, my ass and shoulder hurt from that kayak last night... note to self: wood planks holding kayak from ceiling do not also hold up a human being
Brian got his first ever blow job last night. We should make him a scrapbook.
Think I just subconsciously wanted a cigarette and started sleep walking to Carl's.. Didn't realize what I was doing until I found myself in an elevator.
You sternly pointed at him and declared that you would ride his cock until the early dawn.
Then, you ate a turkey sub, went into his room
i tried to propose to him with my nipple ring but i couldnt figure out how to take it out
P.s. I loved that your balls smelled like coconut
Because you touch yourself at night.
...What time of day am I supposed to do it?
Freshly fucked must agree with my hair cause I've gotten compliments on it this afternoon
I have only been here for a week and might contributed to a dumpster fire on accident.
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