Dude, I just rear-ended a cab
Are you drunk?
A little...yes
Run!
Terrible brother advice.
There was a pool of blood on my desk and we still don't know who it belongs to. missed a good party, man.
The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
you went around the entire night in your french maid costume dusting off the "cob webs" on everyone's crotch saying "you havent gotten any action in a while"
I was wondering why i got so many friend requests the next day...
Her parties are sponsored by Valtrex. This might not be your best idea.
Guess who just hooked up with the cop that fingerprinted her?
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
Standing in a circle of girls fistpumping to the word "hospital" while taking shots.... I don't see this ending well, but its fucking fun.
It took too long for people to come up with things in "never have i ever" so we had to change it to "Don't judge me but.."
I wish I could just hang out in ERs.
That's always how I imagine things at your apartment...
Good, I'm glad you don't have some weird, skewed, clothed version of reality over here.
I just moonwalked my socks off. THAT LAZY. THAT HIGH.
I got so drunk I thought my tennis court was a corn field so I laid in it and ate pizza
Saw the Peanut butter guy at checkout he had at least 30 containers of it and like 6 different kinds...
Randomize
