Riding a fattie is like riding a scooter, its ok just not in public.
using no condom is gross. my vagina has a dress code.
i was so high i thought his mole came off and was flying around
i got pulled over in my 'cops love me' tshirt. he didn't think it was funny when i pointed it out.
I just added her as a friend on Facebook. I met her 5 minutes ago and there are already more than 50 pics of me uploaded... from other nights.
could you please not use my mortar and pestal for its intended purpose? i just snorted cracked black pepper.
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
I just woke up and my mouth tastes like I licked the bathroom floor in the last ghetto bar we were in. I'm going to get my mouth checked for chlamydia. Do I see a dentist for that?
As far as drugs go, alcohol has all the elegance and precision of hitting yourself in the head with a hammer.
They actually said and I quote "it definitely looks like your knees went through some over usage"
Get your clothes on you are our DD for the night. The usual three way payment
I'll have to text you later. Trying to have civilized conversations with the boyfriends parents when I'm 100% aware I just blew their son in the bathroom 5 mins ago. Stay tuned.
I've made out with more people in 2014 than I did the whole fall semester
I'll probably just end up banging you in your parents marital bed,in their honor of course.
You drank whiskey for 9 hours and did not eat anything.Nothing good was going to come from that.
Randomize