so all night Ive been that girl with her tits out @ the bar. I mean I dropped jaws, yo. But in a classy way.
A disheveled girl in front of me just looked down, shrieked, and yelled to the girl next to her "what is this" while pointing at two large white stains near the crotch of her black jeans. I love that Thursdays are weekends, it makes awesome Friday mornings
Oh my god. Oh my god. Oh my god. I drunk emailed a professor on friday. Oh my god. Oh my god.
the girl in my class has a rolling backpack and just told it to stay. im too hungover for this.
If her puking on your pool table is her sign of a good night, it's time to intervene.
I went online and donated $30 to his walk-a-thon as a "sorry I puked in your bed last night"
I think the solution to your phobia is an open relationship with your dildo. about the same responsibility as a pet rock
Also just throwing this out there I don't think anyone who brings another girl back to your bed to share with you can qualify as a frigid bitch
She was eating leaves off of trees and saying it was salad, and even told a guy in passing that her favorite color was plaid.
He stared me down while singing "Let Me Love You" to me while we were having sex. I don't know whether to marry him or file a restraining order.
getting busted for public urination is like, a step above j-walking. you'll be fine
You said "I feel like a koala bear. Do you ever just feel like a koala bear?" This is your brain on drugs.
You mentioned his name and i threw up a little.
A true gentleman never tells. But yes, I did indeed get laid last night
I don't know if it was the movie or the drugs but after i watched it i wore the same spongebob shirt to school for two weeks and stopped showering
Randomize
