Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
I just dumped out my gym water bottle and filled it with white wine. This is the end.
dude that bald bouncer just did a body shot off of brian and then kicked us out for trying to charge him for it
He is eating chips off the floor in the emergency room..
The birthday girl is bringing her own barf bucket, it is going to be a good weekend.
I feel like ass. I'm missing 12 hours of my life and all I have to show for it is an empty wendys bag. Those Shrooms were too much... When do we do it again?
i should probably stop thinking with my vagina, and start using that $70, 000 education i can't afford. what the fuck.
He asked me to hum the Ghost Busters theme song as I was going down on him
She tried to beat him up using a half gallon of Bacardi, instead she got tangled in Kayla's hanging bra and broke a lamp. She can party with us anytime.
So because I got upset you didn't answer I threw my phone in the garbage disposal last night
Never in my life did I dream that I would meet and NFL linesman, let alone that he would be standing before me dressed as a Roman centurion and asking for Vaseline.
Sorry I sent you a video of a singing reverend last night, I was really high.
After the bar we stopped to Meijer where I found myself singing little mermaid while rubbing a pack of hotdogs on my face..
You came in, yelled 'i am from the future' then puked all over the floor
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