I think getting shot is the thing to do in Brooklyn
I would go down on you faster than GM stock
i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
it's kind of nice to have a picture of me making out with someone and actually know who it is for once
Turns out shot glasses hold the perfect serving of sour patch kids....I still fail to see how not having any real glasses is an issue
That's why there are breakfast margaritas.
Things you are not allowed to do while im gone: sell cats on ebay, put cats in freezer again, shave cats like lions, dye cats pink/blue, try to light cats on fire to"wake them up from their nap" agian
Mom just posted ur drunk pix from Cancun in the newly made "My not-so-fantastic son" album. Thought you should know.
she bonged a coffee cause she was hungover. then she bonged a beer cause she got ambitious. then she barfed. then she had to start over again.
New favorite drinking game: bobbing for jello shots. Where did these freshmen come from and when can we go there?
I was trying to pee in the bushes and the person who lived in the house where the bushes were planted started knocking on the window to get me to stop peeing in their bushes
I HAVE NEVER BEEN FRIENDZONED IN MY LIFE AND THIS GIRL IS GOING TO MAKE ME QUESTION EVERYTHING. LIKE A GODDAMN CUNT. A WONDERFUL, BEAUTIFUL, MAJESTIC, LESBIAN CUNT.
guys with girlfriends don't have a leg to stand on when they get mad at you for fucking other guys
Your liver needs more exercise - we start training tonight.
Yeah, but i got vodka and bacon out of it, so it's fine.
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