I just watched Juno. I kind of wish I was in highschool and pregnant
yea ive hooked up with like half those guys
and i've hooked up with the other half...when our powers combine, we are captain slutbag
since when did accompanying a guy to a wedding mean that anal was required that night?
I feel like I bought a front row ticket to watch her screw up her life
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She swallowed my jizz and then took a shot of jack daniels and said "chaser." This cant be real life.
All I remember is yelling RUN as fireworks started going off in the kitchen. Who said that was a bad idea?
im gonna make a bucket list just so i can cross off "underwater blowjob"
Im about to shotgun a beer using my mother's knitting needles. home sweet home.
Going out so taking the 2nd 1/2 of beer w/ me ont'tube in a Pringles tube. I give money to people on the street that have more self respect.
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Is the party worth it?
I am drink. Beer pony and singing.
I just gave an orange Froot Loop the finger for falling on the floor instead of my mouth when I was pouring a mini box of cereal into my face.
I knew it was going to be good when he took off my bra and I only realized 5 minutes later
sex in a hospital.. check
I have a horrible feeling I left my dildo in the kitchen today after washing it. This is my life.
Just got up.... With the club stamp on my ass.... How did it got there????
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