Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
Should I text him? Life is confusing when you actually like someone instead of just wanting to blow them.
it was really awkward, he kept trying to get on the bed with us and we kept having to kick him back on the floor.
I think my goal in life now is to be a Trending topic on Twitter after I die.
watchout when you come home, dougs at the top of the stairs naked eating doritos
The beer is more important than you right now.
I'm drinking rum and coke straight from the 2 liter bottle.
Vegas is awesome. Its like you have a kentucky accent girls automatically assume you don't have herpes.
I just peed next to my dog in the yard. Unparalleled forms of bonding going on over here.
Do you ever wonder how many people have prayed for you to be a better person?
So I am guessing last night was a success we are all accounted for and only 3 of us have hospital bracelets on
Bro, I just googled 36 year old pussy so when I do see it I won't be shocked.
In the mean time, I'll continue to kick ass at running and become a successful stripper while he might hook up with one average looking girl he met at a club. I so win.
idk i was trying to watch Fuller House and you got up out of a dead sleep, just in your boxers, said "no more Dave Coulier" and walked out to the living room and unplugged the router
Ugh hungover at a laundromat is a terrible feeling. For some reason I keep getting sucked into staring at the clothes spinning around and around and it makes me want to profusely projectile vomit everywhere
Randomize
