Why do all fat girls have "that smell"?
ok think of it like jelly beans. if you can learn to like the licorice ones, youll always have lots of them because no one else wants them. its the same with fat chicks
have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
She swallowed my jizz and then took a shot of jack daniels and said "chaser." This cant be real life.
I really don't understand how I cannot figure out how to work a fucking can opener when I'm hungover. Yet I still retained the ability to take a perfectly symmetrical picture of my erect penis and send it to every person in Matt's contacts the night before.
Just found out I slapped a vegan in the face with meat last night.
Come over and help me clean up your so-called "winter wonderland" that you made with the fire extinguisher in the kitchen last night.
You thought last year was bad... a guy dressed as a clown showed up with cocaine
at least i was responsible enough to take off my shoe and throw up in it
You were outside the bathroom the gay guy was puking in, screaming "IT GETS BETTER!" over and over again. Good message, poor execution.
I deem it safe for us to drink together again.
They dropped the charges?
Yeppers. Come drink beers.
We could supplement the Tour with Edward Andre-hands. Because 40s are for the 99%.
One of those days. Also, your pants are now in my protective custody.
So, just saw a lady hysterically sobbing in a Walmart at 3 AM. Someone's not having a happy mother's day.
i feel like ive seen the light, but not in the nasty christian way. thats gross. say no to jesus, kids
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