so explain again why im purple
no
I think taking a nice shit is a lot more satisfying than an orgasm. This is probably why I'm single.
would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
Hit a parked car with a "property of Jesus Christ" bumper sticker. Wrote out five hail mary's and left it on the windshield.
I hated hipsters before it was mainstream.
Blew a line and having a jolly rancher... the day is looking up.
Right, because I totally see myself driving all the way down there to fuck his world famous penis.
Can you tell me how this chicken finger got in my pillow case?
she kept yelling about wanting tacos, so I gave her a piece of bologna in a tortilla. she didn't know the difference
He titled his birthday party on facebook, "BJ's in PJ's- an adult slumber party." I'm the only one invited.
Haha, you avoided her at all costs. And then she shoved her tits in your face
I know you are gonna wanna ask a lot of questions but when we are home I need to cover your face with deli meat and photograph it
You kept chewing on the empty milk carton and saying "kitty" over and over again. It was an interesting night.
He is so pussy whipped she has made him change his name to Toby
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