You'll put your fingers inside me but you won't be my FB friend?
party was madd awkward.. it was like every person who i sat next to in high school and never said hi to was there
Is it weird i consider You Sexy Thing our song?
just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
Not gonna happen. She just told me she puts glitter over the mole on her nose to make it look like a piercing.
i just ate a whole pizza and threw it back up in the time span of 13 minutes. give me the number to guiness book of world records.
Going to bed. I have to wake up early and teach small children. And then have affairs with their fathers. I'm going to get deported.
My econ prof just gave me a shot glass because I was the "randomly picked" winner of the lecture. Ties into our supply and demand lecture, supplied with a shot glass, demand a thirsty thursday
Dude, I just had the best sex of my life in a porta potty at the NCAA girls lax championships but didn't get her name or number. But I have her sunglasses. How is this possible, I'm sad.
I love your life.
i told him I'd let him eat part of a weed cookie out of my cleavage, so he pulled over like a gentleman.
I feel like that's something that he should've asked me over dinner..... instead of with his hand down my pants? maybe not
I just tried to brush my hair with a can opener. Who gave you that brownie
My one night stand ended up seeing me the next morning... For my interview. Guess who got a job.
She calls him the walking dildo to his face. That relationship is already fucked up.
Randomize
