What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
Who would have sex with her? She looks like she shops at baby gap
Yeah he had his two razors labeled "face" and "pubes". Should I be disgusted or impressed?
one of the service guys here said i licked ranch off your face lastnight
All I've consumed over the last couple days is Vanilla Coke, semen, and Coors. I don't think today will be any different.
pre-gaming in the library. just gonna keep going until i'm too drunk to keep working and then i'll be there.
My only expectation is honesty. And three orgasms every time.
Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face.
I woke up this morning to a lot of blurry photos of a swan i must have chased down the riverbank and a handbag full of loose haribo.
Got into Princeton. So excited about the mommy-issue-over-achieving-cock I get to ride the next 4 years!!!
Seriously, even though I keep it clean, I could douse it in bleach and set it on fire and still not be comfortable with you actually holding it. It's been in my VAGINA.
Did my roommate wake up in your girlfriend's apartment in drag again?
I walked in and saw her crying and singing to her dog
She could hold her breath for a long time. Best underwater blowjob ever.
Is it wrong that I have to schedule a family Sunday brunch around my mom's weekly banging of my stepdad. And why do I even know this??
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