it actually wasnt that awkward...i planned on saying hello and walking away..then she asked if i wanted to go to lunch and i looked at her chest and said absolutely
yes because when i jack off the first person i think about is christina applegate
Balls are like the throw pillows of the penis
So she said she wears a diaper when she's on her period and I'm not going to lie, I kind of want to see the diaper.
i am doomed to only fuck guys with curved cocks
his recent searches consisted of "World record for not bathing" and "Miley Cyrus vs Taylor Swift". Not even i am that desperate.
He pulled his pants down and said blow me, while passing out on my bed. I then pulled his pants up as he continuously started moaning in the background.
What I'm trying to say is, that time you chained me to my dresser and made me beg for it was incredibly romantic.
For sure. Gotta go. Building an igloo.
We were high as shit. We argued for like ten minutes about going to Dunkin Donuts and then just ended up rolling down hills. Thanks for the weed.
I think my penis runs off weed. I haven't smoked it 3 days and I have no sex drive what so ever
So he got the TA job but i told him its not official until we have a quickie on his desk. He offered to break into his office. He doesnt start until this fall.
SShout out to Barney the Dinosaur for teaching me how to sing the ABCs backward. I just scored a free pitcher.
Found this cake smashed up inside a box on the sidewalk. Im saying yes to adventure and eating some.
Taking a nap. Sidewalk cake kicked my ass. It had boston creme filling!
What a weekend. It started with me realizing i might not be straight and ended with me spraining my foot.
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