Saw 2 former students outside gas station. gave me money to buy 2 12 packs, asked if I wanted to go to their party.
I told them I had a gf and took one of the 12 packs. Come over.
Texas should really raise its teaching standards.
You were right. It hurts to walk today.
I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
just heard a tri-delta girl talking about her drunken escapades last weekend...it's like the exact plotline to a hardcore porno.
WHOA. WHOA. WTF. WHOA. TOO HIGH FOR HIM TO BE ENGAGED RIGHT NOW.
I woke up and found 10 txts from him. All sent at 6:30 am, and all about the muffin man.
What drink are we having for lunch?
I'm sure we could make a ball of yarn and a nickel into a drinking game
were facing impending death from north korea and were sitting here snorting tylenol to get high.....where did our lives go wrong?
she walked up to me at the bar, kissed me, andthen declared "I HAVEN'T SEEN YOU OR YOUR PENIS SINCE 2011."
I'm literally spending $165 to fly to Arizona to have a sex road trip coming back
Come get me...at gazebo by side entrance....im passed out in a bush...this is a Bar A bouncer texting for your buddy
The two of us went back to your place, had sex, peed in cups, then i went home. Literally all i know
Blueberry probiotics greatly increase to the masturbation experience. Try it dude. It’s all the rage
Decided to stay in tonight. Completely sober. Just got two drunken booty calls within 5 minutes of each other. This is my life.
Randomize
