Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
You can't motorboat a personality
Oh my god he is having a sentimental moment right now.
He just sent me like a really heartfelt confession of love in which he ended with "make the apt, I'll hold your hand while you get your clit pierced."
yeah my walk of shame consisted of driving on the wrong side of the road at 6am still drunk with cum drying in my hair and left eye.
he keeps commenting everything on my facebook. it's like he's virtually peeing on me
Just checked an empty cooler on the flight to Notre Dame. You don't have to tell me you're jealous, I already know.
Definately laid on the floor of the shower this morning drinking the water as it fell on me.
You would not believe how incredibly hard it is to climb on top of a three story apartment buildings roof from the air conditioning unit
I keep having to have that awkward "I don't want to have sex with you" convo. I thought wearing sweatpants was suppose to prevent this situation..
I'm pretty sure this city writes new vice laws specifically because of us.
I've slipped into the part of my life where I am not having sex to get Phils tickets from this chick. I need to seriously rethink my life decisions
guys I just made $20 cause these random south african guys thought I wasn't wearing any underwear
There's no button for "gave my boyfriend's cock to a friend" on my intimacy calendar.
It's your birthday, you should get to jizz where you want to. Jizz when you want tooo
He shampooed and conditioned his pubes but can't manscape for shit.
Randomize
