So Delta doesn't take cash. I used my card to buy a drink and asked the attendant if she could leave it open.
found her sleeping in the closet. woke her up and she said she was camping.
I really shouldn't have to apologize. It was your own damn fault for opening a tab at the bar and telling me about it.
u girls! girls! girls! have fun please don't hook up w/ a roadie! Love, mom
dont call me baby and dont touch my ears. ITS ALL I ASK
My only objective is to get drunk enough to forget the last 364 days.
You're the only person I know who would be upset about making out with a girl you like. You're like a drunken Charlie Brown.
i would really love it if at least once per weekend i did not wake up to you half naked passed out on the floor
they told me if I wanted to live here I had to get an ass tattoo and then they all mooned me simultaneously. ass tattoos as far as the eye could see.
I just wrote a love letter to my weed and texted it to my cousin. I can't say it any differently. It happened.
You did a cartwheel, it was terrible.
I remember that cartwheel, it was okay.
Thinking about licking your asshole. And hugs and stuff too I guess.
I thought accidentally shaving off my fingertip while trying to shave my butthole was going to be the most unexpected part of my day, but no
I FOUND A VIBRATOR IN MY BABY BROTHERS ROOM. IM FREAKIN OUT MAN ITS BIGGER THEN MINE
put it back and chill out ok
NO FUCK HES 15 WHO EVEN SOLD HIM THAT HES A BABY
Is it weird that my mother is taking body shots off my gf after meeting once?
Randomize
