one of my coworkers is shitshow drunk, getting naked. she's about to ride the bull.
i was just going to ask if it would be cool for me to come and have a beer...
it's total chaos here. i may ride the bull... i'll be visible.
He came in asked for the bathroom and came out 10 minutes later dripping wet took his redbull and left.
Gave the kid in the wheelchair at the bus stop a beer and proceede to lift him on the bus. porch drinking brings out the best in everyone
Hey couldn't find water bottle to put margs in whole bottle in purse gonna stop and get cups and ice from starbucks and burrito from una mas want a quesadilla
I just asked the bartender if I could get insurance on my drink in case I spilled it.
WHY DIDN'T YOU INVITE ME TO RUN THROUGH TACO BELL'S SPRINKLERS AT 4AM?!
Just smokin in the creek with some deer, they like the smoke, I know.
Because the guy guy doing the drawing either wanted to bone, or wanted us to stop entering the contest. Either way, we got concert tickets so I'm cool with both scenarios.
This day took a left turn at "This is your going away party, I got a bunch of blow."
at least its a cool name to shout when he's balls deep in you later
Still drunk on my morning "run" which has turned into a walk. Just burped fireball
We almost ended up sober because of u!!
Got really high to see my fist college experience unfold. Too high to find my classroom but I found the McDonald's down the street
We had sex and then ordered pizza after. This relationship is looking good so far.
I can't dude. Last time I was there, I blew the bartender in the bathroom at last call.
Randomize
