He didn't know it yet but he was about to go down on me.
Is it weird i consider You Sexy Thing our song?
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
3 girls crying in the bathroom at the bar. Its like a Christmas song
I just dropped off shoes at Mike's hotel. The chick he hooked up with last night stole his phone and shoes.
Well on the plus side I have started adding benefiber to my bottle of wine
Also what is the name of Americas thing where we had a holy obligation to expand westward? I'm going name my new lighter that.
She had pubes that could make an episode of Duck Dynasty. Fear the Vag Beard
I had a really bad dream about us drinking this weekend. Remind me to tell you Friday when we start drinking
last thing I remember was someone walking in on me sitting in the bathtub listening and singing along to Britney spears "Till the world ends" on repeat.
you went to ralph's and bought all of their pears and left them outside my house
You tried to stop drinking but then she started feeding you tequila with a spoon. You were like an adorable baby bird.
You don't know the capacity of my vagina
I havent moved from the couch and I'm licking peanut butter from a spoon, I'm a beautiful person.
Took the ex out to the bar, then left with her and her best friend....and you said this was a bad thing.
Randomize
