you only like me because i go down faster than a bridge in minnesota
What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
atleast your grandma didn't give you her USED dildo just so you wouldn't have sex.
so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
You know how you thought that you put on a condom last weel?
yea
turns out that you did...and i just found it.
I get way too drunk to be trusted with family heirlooms
Btw, I'm creating an event on fb to celebrate the one yr anniversary since we went to jail.
She's riding a tiny four-wheeler and has a Dos Equis in her hand. I at least have to meet her.
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
If you're fucking that other dude, I'll take the sloppy seconds. I don't care.
There is nothing more demoralizing than exchanging 150 dollar Christmas gifts with a girl your not sleeping with
I basically have a picture with a half naked foreign exchange student. He kept screaming rolltide and i felt like a traitor
Bunch of Navy warships just sailed into New York Harbor for Fleet Week. Nobodys getting laid this weekend.
Hurry up I'm getting mooned by a hobo
Things he's good at: oral sex and geometry. Things he's not good at: actual sex.
Randomize
