I won a flip cup tournbment! Why is boot and rally so hard when youre old?
what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
Is it awkward that I've slept with every guy in this room?
Only if they know about it too.
She looks like Sash Grey but sounds like Fran Drescher. Advise.
I can only imagine the horrible things my future wife is doing on spring break right now.
We found your brother, passed out, floating in our pool, with a bottle, on a blow up mattress. How did he mange to walk 2 blocks and get into our backyard?
my fake id says im a 34 yr old russian lady ... how is this working
She wanted to make popcorn, but the air-popper was broken. So she dumped the entire container of kernels into the clothes dryer. Drunk movie night was a success!
I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago
How was that my fault?! I made you breakfast and gave you cake, as you asked. Then, you initiated sexual activity.
I hooked up with Spider-Man on the hood of Santas car. I kept saying that he could shoot his web at me. Also I found Waldo. Overall good night.
Well I want to be mistreated and called a slut and finger banged
But I guess hugs would be nice
But what we lack in money, we make up for in dry humor and drugs
Soo are you just gonna poop in my bathtub and not talk to me anymore...?
I was at a hookups house and peed in his sink so I wouldn't wake up his mom... drunk me is on a different level
Randomize