are you so shy because you have an std?
Her little brother was home, so we had to hook up while playing hide and seek with him
med student doing my blood work at the AIDS clinic just hit on me after I told him i was having unprotected sex, but didn't think i had HIV.
Packing up everything in the dorm. Silly bands to unused condom ratio is ridiculous.
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who knew i was capable of sobriety and human-like emotions all in the same night?
juast therw a cheeeeesestirng over the fnce. stuckit to sombodys car winheild... gonna luagh if i find it mlted in the mrning.
No sexy Asian girl. No comfy bed. I'm just gonna lie here in the hall next to the garbage can until someone comes home.
He barely got in the door before she began to shriek like a banshee and punch him. His rainbow wig is still hanging from the front porch as a "warning to all other clowns".
not now. havin a heart to heart with drunk fred flinstone
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Pounding your chest saying "me Tarzan" is not flirting or even talking
the new numbers in my phone would beg to differ
It's my birthday weekend! I'm getting a Brazilian and he's going to fucking Arkansas. Where the fuck are his priorities?
Dealing with people is so much easier after you've had an orgasm or 4.
Something like, "Merry Christmas. I hope Santa shits in your mouth."?
she just sent our roommates a message asking them for a parakeet. are you gonna call later?
That's the only way to watch Gumby. Either age 5 or high.
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