the power's out. i'm smoking weed by flashlight
i wish i was dedicated to anything like you are to weed
How old was that tiny chick? she needs a lard iv.
Do I need to let your sister outside to go pee or anything before I leave?
I can actually hear my brain cells scream as they die when she speaks.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just found my car keys in your throw-up.
So it turns out rose was the bear hunting girl. Fuck my life
None of those words made sense together.
Chicken wings don't come back up an through your nose as easily as you'd think
But he buys me breakfast and goes down on me THATS HARD TO FIND
I'm such a good drunk match marker. You single, you single... Drunk friend meet single boy. BOOM illegitimate baby made!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
is there any kind of "im boning my neighbor and he happens to be a manager at walmart" discount that our new relationship entitles me to??
You can't be friends with my side piece. Conflict of interest.
Yea. I feel great. My life is great. My job isn't as shitty. And my daddy loves me. I love strip clubs. Great self esteem boost.
The awkward moment your booty call shows up to the Mexican restaurant and realizes you just picked burritos over pussy
How did the surgery go?
My face feels like a marshmallow.
There’s a stripper dressed like a slutty pilgrim. Is that a thing?
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