Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
well it doesn't count as a walk of shame if he drops you off at your class in his golf cart
its not a holiday until ive ruined the family picture because im drunk
The fact that he grabbed my boob in the middle of the conversation shows something needs to change
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Lots of rum and cokes. Bartender wore my underwear on his head. Lost my keys. Accidentily started a fight. DC is going to kill me
Wanna go watch Transformers and scream "AMERICA!"? I need a no thought activity
Idk wtf I would do on a date. I thought wed passed that stage at least for a while. Nowadays dates should consist of blackouts and shameful mistakes.
Shouldn't have fucked on the top bunk, I bounced so high my hair got caught in the ceiling fan and almost broke my neck.
hey remember that mom you brought home from the bar last month... she is currently driving me back to her place. turning my phone off now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Wow has his pick up routine ever gotten bad. He is trying to use cheese as a way to flirt with the waitress
Oh man, he played the Harvarti cheese card and it didn't work. Now he is flailing
I told the cops they couldn't arrest me until they found my shoe. Now I have the grant county cops looking for my heels by the rail road tracks.
Just woke up to Siri reminding me that i need to kill the giant orange spider in my room, because it's sorcery and witchcraft is sacrilegious. Did you give me LSD again!?!??!
THIS IS NOT A LAUGHING MATTER, CAITLIN. MY PARENTS ARE FUCKING. LOUDLY.
I’m sorry I got high and yelled about the patriarchy.
You mentioned his name and i threw up a little.
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