Exactly. I don't do penetration on the first date. Blowjobs however are perfectly acceptable.
I encourage the greeting beej. It determines if the dick is worth keeping around.
ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
I just got fire extinguished by his roommate while we were having sex. That's just taking cock blocking to a whole new level.
All I wanted was a "this is what America feels like" blowjob before I left. Is that too much to ask for?
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
Meeting girls and telling em you have no hair on your calves is not an acceptable pick up line
So my dad just walked in on me with the same girl twice in 3 nights. I told him if he wants to see her tits to adleast admit it. All he did was smirk.
Juss got out of jail; shes still in there tryin to sing her abc's backwards bc the cops neva asked her too... Whebever she gets to t she starts singin the tequilla song
This is NOT the time to take our hits and go to Disney. Let me repeat that. NOT THE TIME FOR DISNEY ON ACID
I'm so confused as to where the sexual euphemisms end and the drinking starts
Went to take a shower. Brought my wine, forgot my towel.
Noted. Next time you want to get fried chicken and cocaine.
Ok. That just sounds baller.
Whenever someone said no you would yell "Die Motherfucker." Kind of like some twisted drinking game.
the girls would appreciate it if you invited over some drunk, single, straight men with low standards.
scotch tastings during the week is a baaad idea. i woke up w no pants but wearing my winter coat
Randomize
