bobby jindal makes me wanna cover my ears. you make me wanna smile.
Do you know how hard it is to conceal the fact that you puked all over the bed that someone is sleeping in?
my underwear are soaked with white zifandel yet i have continued to wear them despite the fact im at home
is it possible for your nipples to fall off? if so mine might. they hurt so bad...
Life lesson. Learning to pee left handed is easier than learning brickbreaker left handed. Rather lose a few drops than a few lives
And we hooked up in the carwash. I told you our creative juices were flowing today.
First coke bust down the road. Spring is finally here.
omg dinner turned into a foam party this is weiriiid
Tonight will be judged a success if I walk out without having thrown up on my shirt.
He slow fucked me. Doggy style. On a porch. You never slow fuck doggy style. Its a law. A LAW.
I know you hold the fastest time for "zoo downhill wheelchair racing" but I don't see what that has to do with this.
All I remember is this kid kept saying that he has a dream that white kids and black kids can take shots together as one, and just we'd keep drinking to that.
Can we go one day without you telling me that your dick misses me
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
Okay, the good news, found Jared, all IDs accounted for, Jack is meeting us at yours with your requested the delivery. The bad news: Lost Alice, banned from Stages, possibly fucked my TA in the bathroom.
Randomize
