Sorry if I ruined your sex last night with my constant text updates about the plot of Bolt.
My mom can no longer prohibit me from smoking pot..I sell to her boyfriend.
Reggie can tackle my bush.
I got my period while he was fingering me , I knew it because I never get that wet.
Did u at least say sorry?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Showerbowl immediately followed by pullups naked. I feel like fucking Tarzan
As I sit on the toilet at 4 am I realize tonight could have gone a lot better
So burnt out. Like weed hangover. And someone just fell through the ceiling outside of my class. How's your morning going?
You're right. Single life welcomed me back with open arms. It's like it knew it wasnt going to be long when I left.
Your message cut off at "shit on the floor". Your life is incredible.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh and yeah that does count as public urination.
It was all fun and games until he noticed the hickey that he hadn't given me...
Why do I have a separate credit card just for booze? Because I saved enough points so Saturday we are flying to Denver to smoke legal weed and fly back in the same day.
Also mom is not happy about me telling her how much i want the women sprinters on the Olympics to beat me up
I woke up this morning cradling my vibrator like it was a baby
Scary. I hope people take me seriously. Maybe I should black out less to be sure
Randomize