you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
I can't finish this paper in my room because every time I get distracted I start masterbating. I think it's time to go to the library...
1. I feel like Jello 2. The girl i hooked up with last night isn't here and a different girl is lying next to me. 3. I have no clothes on 4. Can guys go on walks of shame?
fyi gin and iced coffee...not my greatest invention
We made a drinking game out of Project Runway. Gay guys are so fun.
had a guy just try to take his underwear off in the middle of the bar w o taking his pants off. That kind of Sunday afternoon
you can't wake me up at 4am to suck your dick and then give me a high five at the bar
It feels like eating ice cream while riding a unicorn over a rainbow waterfall made of glitter.
That is possibly the gayest thing that was ever thought of by anyone anywhere.
I just looked at your pics on Facebook....there was cake? Where the fuck was I!?
I'm bringing my passport in case we get drunk and wind up in Mexico
I just bought a butt plug on Amazon prime day and you're the only person I felt would appreciate that decision
The dude we met that gave us weed sent me a video of his balls covering the sun like a solar eclipse
Yes please. My parents would fucking love him and I'd love fucking him. That's a win-win if I've ever seen one.
How was your day?
Peaceful. I left the house to get paid and get fried chicken.
Man, I miss taking bong rips in my room. Now they are bringing dogs around so all my stuff is hidden in random places up in the woods. I literaly have to hunt and gather just to get high.
Randomize
