Small dicks are the new regular sized dicks.
What kind of soap washes out shame, bad decisions, and whiskey?
Irish Spring?
Remind me to tell you the Scottish bar story tomorrow
Remind me to tell you it was a shitty story when you're done telling it tomorrow
just got tipped $5 to put a barbie in a waffle cone and drip caramel sauce on it while a group of dudes cheered and one took pics. 90% sure they were sober
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my mom was in labor with me for 32 hours, it's only fair to start drinking now.
Something about getting whistled at in my work clothes while crossing the street with three Nuvarings in my back pocket feels wrong.
They want yo temporarily sterile ass.
This message brought to you by inappropriate slogans. Cotton candy, melting in your mouth like boners.
I'm just trying to absorb as much of the fluids from the carpet as I can.
I told my grandmother all I want is a nice guy who likes to be tied up.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
You started pulling out condoms from your fanny pack and threw them at all the couples on the beach
My dad told me to bring weed to easter Sunday dinner..
shut up and let me use my vagina as a weapon of self destruction in peace!
I promised her I would shit on your driveway. There's nothing that you or I can do about it now.
I BLEED THE BLOOD OF MY ANCESTORS WHO FOUGHT SO BRAVELY FOR MY FREEDOM
cool u want pads or tampons
tampons please
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