I bet when she looks at herself in the mirror she wishes brown paper bags were in fashion.
Dude ! Why is there vomit with whole pieces of sushi in the shower when the toilet is not more than 2 feet away ? btw you need to chew your food better,
Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
It's noon and i am somehow drinking by myself in a jazz tent in broad daylight.
Just fucked a hooker at a motel in New Jersey. Two states down, 48 to go.
I didn't think it was possible for the human body to be physically dependant on weed until I moved in with this kid
video games are the ultimate cock blocker
I want to get so wasted that I make middle aged irish men look like mormon girls
Driving to get a preg test with my ex, wearing my unicorn hat
You are so not ready for motherhood
There is nothing quite so pathetic as sitting in bed in your underwear eating easy mac in complete silence, waiting for Netflix to load
he doesn't sweat normal. maybe that's what THC smells like coming through the sweat glands...
I woke up at 3:30 this morning to pee. Luckily, I didn't have to travel far as I was asleep in my CLOSET on my yoga mat. Good news is I had a pillow...
Dollars spent: $83, Girls kissed: 4, Girls slept with:2, Girls currently making me breakfast: 1, Fucks given: 0
I didn't really understand how big 10 inches is. Now I know.
Your dick. My mouth. We have 20 minutes.
Randomize
