I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
Whose surfboard did we steal and why is there a wood carving of a pelican in the fridge where the beer used to be?
Just tried to put my sweatpants on backwards...the chances of passing my physics exam just went down about 100%.
so he reminded me it was our 9 month anniversary and then said "we could've had a baby by now"
I don't know what happened last night but I woke up this morning with "wolf pack" tattooed on my knuckles.
Disney World has no open container laws. Ohmygod this place is even cooler than it was when I was ten.
you'll never guess what i found when i got home...
a cake, in the toilet
I hope the walls stop moving before my manager notices that i'm still drunk.
But today feels so special with katie getting herpes and me cleaning my room. Good things are happening.
We aren't really supposed to respect our bodies til our mid twenties.
So neither of us had a dollar bill and we couldnt find a straw so we spent all nite doing coke through penne pasta
I just got three pairs of underwear free and a bathing suit for $20 by modeling them and letting the salesman grope me a bit.
It's great being a young gay man in Chicago!
That sounds worse than that time you thought out an entire story of how big bird would kill you
Pretty sure I just scored Election Day sex based on the theory that if either of these fools win the world as we know it is over so we might as well get a few orgasms in...
You kept pointing at me and saying I'm getting chicken parmesan and no one is going to stop me
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