I feel like I'm in dance class right now
Betty ford says i'm here all night
Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
This sounds like "Sober" Ericka. Sorry that message wasn't for you. I only do business with "Fell off the wagon" Ericka. Please pass that message along to her.
apparently i'm really good at getting wasted, having sex all night, getting multiple hickeys and oversleeping father's day brunch. this is the third year its happened.
You are so predictable. I am willing to bet 20$ that instead of going out you are sitting on your couch, stoned, watching Seinfield re-runs and eating cheezits.
1. they're goldfish. 2 fuck you
I wonder if you're allowed to smoke pot at Denver bronco games now...
Just accidentally flashed my junk to the lady helping me try on suits, it was cold in there, I don't think she was impressed.
please remind me of this if i ever start out a night declaring my goal is to see how much american honey it takes for me to forget who i am again
THEY DIDN'T THROW MY PORN AWAY!!!!
ITS THE CIIIIIIRCLE OF SLUUUUUUUTS
I'm talking to this guy I met online about French toast. I am the oddest fucking combination of hungry and horny. Wtf brain.
Learn from my mistakes. DO NOT try to steam a garment of clothing while you are wearing it. The burn is not worth the de-wrinkle.
I just got yelled at by a stripper for being a tease.
I feel like the physical embodiment of the pot leaf eyes smiley face
Randomize
