I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
I've banged too many servicemen's wives to still be considered an American.
thank you for tagging me in all my pictures as "skank" and yourself as "made by the hands of God"
This morning is cloudy with a high chance of vomiting all over the dentist. Stay tuned for further updates.
Your a horrible friend, i only tried to do the right thing by moving you off the floor.. that was not an invitation to puke all over my bed and attempt to use my dog to mop it up.
I know we said we never would. But try fucking a fat guy. He put in so much more effort and then made me waffles.
She's high and running across rooftops. Yes we're going to end up in A&E again.
I have never encountered a chode in the wild
Did you send me a cake saying 'Happy 1st One-Night Stand Ever'?
He literally poured blue Gatorade on me after we had sex and said "good game" all over my white sheets
Is it sacrilegious to take tequila shots on Saint Patrick's day?
His 89 y/o father walked in on us. Judging by the gasp/moan, I don't think the 1920s prepared him to see another dude inside his son.
So our night ended with 6 cruisers, a fire truck, and an ambulance. Also, lots of blood. How was yours?
Ever get that feeling that you're the back up booty call and half way through securing the fake date excuse to try to get in your pants, the guy hears back from the original booty call and drops the conversation with no explanation?
so this hot guy who looks like brad pitt circa troy era in my physics lab is staring at me right now and it's taking all the willpower I have not to procreate with him right now.
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