You know how britney does the hair flip too much in her new videos? Thats me right now
I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
i woke up to 115 texts from him all saying "do you love me??"
Is it bad that I stopped wanting to fuck her as soon as I noticed she had dry skin?
I sometimes completely doubt that you're straight.
I stole a road cone for their 13 yr old son. Apparently I told him to put Christmas lights on it, and "treat her like a lady."
He came in like 30 seconds. That's how I know he hasn't been cheating on me while I've been gone
test run with donkey pinata disastrous. broken glass and tequila EVERYWHERE
sorry for allegedly lighting the beer pong balls of fire
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
I don't want to be with anyone who doesn't accept me for who I am. eating cheeseburgers in bed is my favorite activity.
I don't know. She kept pirouetting across the kitchen while making dinner. I just sat there stoned.
you were angry and didn't have anything else to throw so you threw a breakfast burrito...?
Woke up with a padlock locked onto my ear gauge and the first of many sticky note clues on my chest leading to the key.
DUDE!!!!! THERE IS A MIDGET HANDING OUT RICE KRISPIE TREATS!!!!!! WHERE ARE YOU WHEN THE COOL SHIT GOES DOWN???????
Weight watchers just said "you've tracked beer three times recently, want to make it one of your favorites?" I'm begining to understand why I needed to go in the first place.
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