3:47a: I take it you're not on your way over
everything is bigger in texas. Including my drinking problem.
Change your flight to Denver. That's where my penis is.
Im debating on how to word my craigslist post so i dont get arrested...
we're using his nephews tonka truck toy as a cooler for the beer
it's gotten to the point where there are no existing good choices. even our good choices are bad choice by anyone's standards but ours.
its the kind of night you break several limbs and say you were lucky
You pole danced in your parka.
He skipped an important family function with his dying father to fuck me. Terrible human, amazing fuck buddy.
The part where he comes over and ignores you isn't what makes me mad about that story... It's the fact that he ate your tacos, AND THEN proceeded to ignore you. That's cold hearted.
I think I sent pictures of my boobs to an Olympic athlete...
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
I woke up spooning with two strangers on Saturday morning... I felt like a sexual sandwich
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
I literally blew him under my face mask. Not because I thought it'd protect me from COVID, but because I wanted to prove to myself that I could.
Randomize
