Uggggg i want to leave and get bombed over baghdad
My bed smells like naked
Haha. At least it doesn't smell like herpes
He walked in AS I was cumming. Now even my father knows I'm a squirter.
Just puked in the monkey exhibit at the zoo. They ate it. I don't want a pet monkey anymore.
The drunken tricycle race really added some class to the Tour de Franzia. Until everyone wiped out and started puking.
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
Now that you're back together are you gonna tell him you set his stuff on fire?
I'm just here to guide your spirit, avoiding herpes is on you though
Luke did at least 8 shots of pure mayonnaise last night. I am not sure if that is better or worse than my 2 cement mixers?
I don't remember what you were saying to me in the bathroom. But whatever it was, yes, because i remember nodding a lot.
Suspicion confirmed. my mom has her nipples pierced
Way to crack the case Nancy Drew
Fuck you fireball...just straight up fuck out of here
Now that it's over, I can finally say it and not feel bad,dude. Her mustache is better than yours.
...blackout vacation is awesome. Where did you end up? I think i'm in Miami.
Hospital.
Jesus better clutch that motherfucking wheel, then.
I'M NOT PUTTING MY TRUST IN JESUS! I'M PUTTING MY TRUST IN YOU!
Randomize
