is it bad that the only reason i knew what antidote meant in class today, was from years of playing pokemon?
and you tried to get a free burrito from Potbelly's
My mom just called and reminded me not to throw up in any cabs tonight. Happy St. Patty's Day.
i just realized that im half way to my goal of puking in every single toilet on our floor
Just walked in on my older brother getting a bj. He told the girl to "keep going" and then attempted to high five me
My mouth already tastes like senor cuervo took a piss in it and it's barely 1 am
I decided they need a food cart that just roams around the library like the cotton candy people at the circus. But with real food. like tacos cause it sounds delicious.
I am so proud of him. After eating the rest of our shrooms, he finally registered to vote
I just laughed at the word pudding. I have no idea whats going on right now.
Nothing better than going to Mass on Easter Sunday with "I love penis" henna tattooed across your back. Love your Indian culture.
Sometimes you just gotta fuck a has been local celebrity for your 15 minutes.
Do you remember the bathroom attendant when he put out his hand for a tip and you gave him a high five?
im about to bake her parents a "thank you for making such beautiful babies, ive had sex with all 5 of them" cake
Oh my god.. Saw a commercial for Captain Morgan. Made me gag a little bit.
You ran full speed into the glass door with your Patron and yelled "FEEL THE RHYTHM, FEEL THE RHYME"
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