YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
there are so many fish in the see you have left to fuck
I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
The crazy thing is, I dont actually know where the cat is, she said something bout the back of the toilet and a sock.
These 25 People Had Very Inappropriate Sexual Relations(hips)
hey I'm just gonna fall asleep in the bathroom at the library call me when you're done with class
Last night at the bar my fuck buddies found out about each other.
Wtf? What happened?
Not quite sure but they rock, paper, scissored to see who was taking me home.
You couldve had sex with 2 drunk chicks on an alligator slide.
If you're going to outback I'll have to decline, I've slept with a large enough portion of their staff already.
You were hanging upside down on the subway with your feet in the stirrup handle bars. the children were amused.
These 31 People Are Lazier Than You Could Ever Imagine
His balls looked like two miss shaped chicken nuggets
Her Grandmother felt me up AND paid for dinner. If she doesn't get her shit together I'm gonna be her Step Grandfather.
Hey have you ever thought about fishing cause I'd like to go fishing but don't know anyone that fishes and I'm gonna cry because. FISHING
She jumped on a table and took off her shirt and started yelling things that no one understood. For being 3, she has a dead on impression of a drunk party girl.
So "I hate myself Mondays" has extended to Tuesday this week. I just had peanut butter and a glass of wine for lunch.
I'm so drunk and angry about the Michigan game the fact of my relationship being over doesn't matter