You walked in with a firecracker and a doughnut then demonstrated what a lazy job he did fucking you
He looks like he has a penis
What the fuck
A good one, a good penis
When are you comin back?
probably mid next week, depending on when i finish my remaining half gallons
we're almost there. Shes pounding on the car window telling the nurse whos on a smoke break to fuck off.
Then I realized I was alone sitting on the bathroom floor brushing my teeth at 2am laughing to myself.
I'm not sure which one did it but one of them fucked the kink out of my neck
I can't tell whether I'm a) still hungover from two nights ago, b) legitimately sick or c) all of the above... multiple choice was never my forte
You know it's a good party when even the dealers were too fucked up. Just found and counted 140 E pills I found in a bag in the couch. Just paid for weed this month.
Breathalizer & tazer party did not go as casually as expected.
Well who could blame her. I would run away from me if I could.
Me and this 7 year old almost finished a large pizza. And when I say me and this 7 year old I really mean me.
Well for decently drunk, in the woods, last-person-i-should-be-hooking-up-with sex, i thought it was pretty good.
I want to die, ON THAT, with that INSIDE ME. ironically, I sense that would be the only time I'd feel alive.
Ya apperently its not "appropriate" to fuck in the school auditorium
Does this cleavage amount say, “Fuck it, I’m over dating, let’s just fuck?”
Randomize
