Remember, sex is not sex til both people cross the finish line. Until then, it is just a favor.
Fyi mom and I voted and you're the DD tonight, congratulations
We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
She had a maple leaf tattoo behind her ear and told me she liked my "playoff beard".
Only in Canada would your laziness be applied to hockey and rewarded.
I can't. I can't get out. He cooked me food. And made me jager bombs. And painted a glow in the dark smilie face on my boobs
I seriously might throw up right now. In class. Sunglasses on. I'm getting too old for this.
Sorry about bonging beers with your mom but in all fairness you were late...
Lmao the neighbor heard yall last night She wanted me to tell you way to finish strong
remember how i yelled at you for inviting that coke dealer to the party?! i found the $100 bill they were snorting with in the couch.
..new slutty dresses or booze? i won't even waste time with the i told you so.
we went to go get waffles and then i sucked his dick in a parking lot. average tuesday.
I honestly just wanna put my face in her tits and disappear from this plane of existence
Listening to sad Lana Del Rey songs together is an integral part of the lesbian bonding process
I am convinced you could sleep through the apocalypse and only wake up because youre hungry & want Dominoes
Where'd you go?
Laundry, im. A responsible drunk
Want to help me interview candidates to replace my Cub/Boy Toy when he leaves for grad school next month?
Randomize
