is it bad that i kinda- ok, reallyyy don't remember having sex with him last night?
let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
seeing an 80 year old woman puke in the bushes changes everything...
that's spring break in florida for ya
And I was the only one who felt it was dangerous to set the tv and blender on the ledge of the hot tub
So I drew a giant robot attacking a city on the chem test. My TA colored in the fire on the burning building
Questioning the dried heart shaped nutella on my boobs. Valentines day has begun.
I've been very busy/drunk lately... Sorry.
My night ended with Em alternately crying and throwing up in the arms of a guy wearing a cutoff and a tiara. I sat holding a garbage can and wine glass full of water wondering how our night got to this point.
so it took us like 45 minutes to get into the party.... then when we wanted to leave we were blocked and forced to stay.
....you got kicked INTO a party??
He said I looked like a ballsack and I tried to choke him out with my Ghostbusters pajama pants. Happy fucking Halloween.
Who's the easier target... Bandages on the knees, tramp stamp, or bra showing? Not in the mood to work for it tonight.
I think I'm going to call this chapter of my life story "Weekday day-drinking in the park isn't just for the homeless!"
I'm gonna play eenie meenie at the bar tonight because it's women's day and I deserve the dick
So if I run into you on the street, I'm supposed to just stop drop and suck your dick?
Hey, I left a taco in your dishwasher.
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