FYI..good luck when you get back from work.. mom and dad know about the boy you brought home last night
haha good one..how did you even know?
we all know. he obviously didn't leave when you might have told him to.. he came down when we were eating because he coud smell mom's cooking. the dude ate with us and offered to say grace. so yeah, good luck.
Lesson Learned this Week... If it seems too good to be true he is probably just trying to get you pregnant.
Dude, didnt you only know that guy for a month and he is demanding offspring?
Apparently, at this age my womb is an early conversation
So high. I just took a picture of my chewed gum so I can remember to paint a picture of it as a cloud later.
I appreciate the offer. Swallowing pride is much like swallowing cum, difficult and unpleasant
So i closed my laptop as i started to fall off my bed and then i caught myself and realized that moment of catching myself is the difference between tuesday and friday.
It's only been a week and i've already broken my no summer randoms rule twice.
He never gives up. He's like the fucking little engine that could of hook ups
holy fuck man...it feels like I got beat the fuck out of by death's baseball bat...chimichangas?
I mean, two foreign guys have drunkenly confessed their love for her, so she's clearly doing something right.
I was cracking open beer cans, throwing them off the roof, and yelling "FRAG OUT!"
Sorry it's taking so long, it's harder to take an ass pic with an iPad than you think
I'm pathetic. I'm eating cream puffs in the bath and crying a little.
I dont remember you getting a condom thrown at you. I think I had a concusion
"Here let me wipe my uterus off your dick" was probably the most unsexy thing said after period sex. I should get an award
Someone's gotta tell him drunk sex comes before dating
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