Your ability to be a slut in your nightmare astounds me
I just want one of her status not to be about Jesus.
i thought i should point out that whatever else you can say about me, i've still gotten high with a midget.
Id have to say flaming beer pong was a royal success.
She just tricked me into telling her the balance of my 401k... She's like a gold digging jedi mind trick ninja
If I had that in my pants Omg I would want a shirt made so everyone knew
She ran over a curb, took out a yard-sale sign and hit a fence before admitting to me that she may be losing her vision "a bit". Never letting grandma drive again.
It was kicking off big time until you crawled out the bar on your hands and knees. Nobody wanted to mess with that.
I took a yellow and pink pill, all of a sudden my sex drive is back, and for some reason all I wanna do is fuck Amish dudes
Good God, I miss doing unknown drugs with you.
I feel like cursing someone's first born child right now. Like I wanna maleficent some bitch.
This snow needs to melt so I can get wasted on someones front lawn
Are you 5:30 blackout again?
he's such a nice guy...he deserves a bigger dick.
just woke up with nickles taped to my body. theres like a dollar worth.
Showed up to pick her up in my boxers. Lets just say im 2 for 2 with this new idea
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