Homeslice needs to figure out he's so 2006
Definitely just saw the guy I went on a date with Friday night dressed in medeival knight gear on the quad preparing for battle. Oh my God.
Just looked at my call log. I called Planned Parenthood at 3am.
"Is there dairy in semen?" was in her recent google searches...so she's lactose intolerant AND a slut.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just signed my boyfriend up on a dating website so I could officially have a reason to leave him for my hot neighbor.
some guy just burried his vomit in the sand.
I feel like the other woman.
You ARE the other woman.
When the cop tells you to leave the pool, does that mean you have to put your bathing suit back on too?
porn backed up onto portable hard disk, laptop charged, battery backup in place, two cases beer, handle of vodka, poptarts and beef jerky --- bring it sandy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Obviously. I'm here to let you eat things off my boobs and help you get laid.
After a while I was so wet that I started crying. HE MADE ME SO HORNY I WEPT.
You hit a new plane of existence as we all watched in awe
and it's like......my shirt is off and he's talking about quidditch. why.
Are you drunk already?
Not already - at LAST.
Who the hell tries to steal eggnog.
Randomize