It was like if Side-show Bob had a vagina for a mouth
my drunk uncle just explained that turkeys are not gentle lovers... and no context doesn't make it better.
just bought a $25 eighth from a chick who has a kid. i'm helping my community out right?
I need to get the stench of sex and broken dreams out of my room
He used one end of the towel to wipe the cum and I used the other end to wipe the tears
The fact you even thought licking it would fix it boggles my mind
Well it worked
Not the point
He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
Honestly, it's not that easy picking a Saturday night outfit that can translate to Palm Sunday mass. Priorities.
Ok, Jen and I are going out tonight and getting rowdy. I think you and Steph need to come. I understand if you can't, but not going out means you're automatically obligated to post bail. If necessary.
you can only text me tonight if its in drake lyrics. thats the rule
As he was going down on me, I looked over his shoulder and said "ohh a Christian mingle commercial is on"
It looks like you got dick slapped by the sandman..
Just went grocery shopping with a vibrator in my purse and didn't even realize it. This is what Saturdays are made for.
First of all she starred talking about God which immediately killed my buzz
Why is there a waffle in the knife drawer?
The real question is why are there knives in the waffle drawer.
Randomize
