So I just had this crazy idea, and no it has nothing to do with the fact that they made me take shots at work.
what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
Small Doughy Asian men and sleeveless hoodies with nothing underneath do not mix well.
Sounds like the climatic scene of my favorite erotic novel.
I was too high to figure out which of the three doors would lead me to my classroom, so i sat down in the middle of the hallway and ate a twinkie.
she just threw a smoke bomb in an elevator and ran down 9 flights of stairs to see it at the bottom.
Hooked up with an Aussie chick last night only an Indonesian chick away from completing my lap around the pacific rim
Did i actually sleep there? Or did i just get sand everywhere?
I caught them hiding behind a car trying to have sex.
I thought you were single?
I am. But thats cuz no one wants to marry shame and regret doused in tequila. But thanks for reminding me ya dick.
I only remember singing the Captain Planet theme song on our way to the bars.
Sleeping with him wouldn't be considered hoeing out... It seems more like babysitting.
Pretty sure the delivery guy saw me taking a shit this morning
He shit in the fireplace
i woke up with blood and cuts on my face and i don't remember anything after winning four games of beer pong in a row last night. and i'm still drunk.
you are a true champion. bear my children.
Is it uncouth to masturbate the night before a gyno appointment?
Randomize
