North Korea, Best Korea!
And I just threw up at the table during Mother's Day Brunch.
Is it a little weird that I have a ridiculous urge to have sex while the theme song to the Pirates of the Carrbibbean blares in the background?
I just heard a mom tell her toddler son "shut the fuck up. Don't ask me to buy you shit when i'm taking u to go see some fucking animals" welcome to the bronx.
So apparently last night I was running around columbus circle station screaming that Obama was a pussy and that "waterboarding should always be an option" lol
I was arrested last night for attempting to flee and elude. I wasn't really trying to run from the police. I was drunk and lost in the woods. I thought it was pretty obvious when I was waving at them from my puddle of puke that I wasn't really hiding.
Can you come over to my place and make up for the crap you called sex yesterday?
Good morning to you
I'm more impressed with the spaghetti smoothie at the present moment.
I know you're trying to keep the moaning to a minimum but the banging on the wall is totally giving you away
Um, so I couldn't say it in person, but if you find my underwear in your office. Sorry. I couldn't find them, so yea.
I could see myself reflected in his wedding band as i was going down on him.
He told me since I'm into organics I should know his meat is known locally for its quality and hes hand raised it since age 13.
I will always remember today as the day I narrowly escaped having to touch a tiny penis
Oh fuck, I'm officially a cougar..he's got the same name as my grandson
i just woke up in my dog's bed, on my parents floor, my outfit on backwards, and a bottle of lube poured down my pocket.
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